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<div style="background:#fff;border:#bbb dashed 1px;padding:5px"><a href="http://en.citatepedia.ro/comments.php?id=448434" style="color:#000;text-decoration:none"><div style="margin:10px 0"><strong>Food For Thought</strong></div><div style="margin:10px 0">She hid it</div><div style="margin:10px 0">but it became clear to her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">even as a child</div><div style="margin:10px 0">she was obsessed with food-</div><div style="margin:10px 0">all the world and her relationships in it-</div><div style="margin:10px 0">became things to be tasted; </div><div style="margin:10px 0">consumed.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">In her twenties she did not date men</div><div style="margin:10px 0">she tasted them</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and became bored</div><div style="margin:10px 0">with them as one becomes</div><div style="margin:10px 0">bored with the routine</div><div style="margin:10px 0">of every day the same meal; </div><div style="margin:10px 0">food was orgasmic to her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">in its variety</div><div style="margin:10px 0">but too, </div><div style="margin:10px 0">this was something she had to hide</div><div style="margin:10px 0">because being that way also</div><div style="margin:10px 0">had its guilty side; </div><div style="margin:10px 0">all day long</div><div style="margin:10px 0">she thought about what she would eat</div><div style="margin:10px 0">that night</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and the next day</div><div style="margin:10px 0">or even reliving</div><div style="margin:10px 0">a last meal</div><div style="margin:10px 0">re-tasting it in her mouth</div><div style="margin:10px 0">it all seemed natural to her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">because it seemed to her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">others seemed to share as well</div><div style="margin:10px 0">foods power.</div><div style="margin:10px 0"> </div><div style="margin:10px 0">It was a need to take</div><div style="margin:10px 0">the outside in</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to feel it in her mouth</div><div style="margin:10px 0">swallow it down</div><div style="margin:10px 0">tongue on texture</div><div style="margin:10px 0">then a final act</div><div style="margin:10px 0">of it resting inside her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">as she digested it, </div><div style="margin:10px 0">sometimes bulimically</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to assuage guilt</div><div style="margin:10px 0">it being hidden heavings</div><div style="margin:10px 0">in bathrooms, hers and those</div><div style="margin:10px 0">of her friends</div><div style="margin:10px 0">but always returning</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to the need to fill up the Empty</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to feel full</div><div style="margin:10px 0">filled</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to make it through some nights</div><div style="margin:10px 0">eating</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to assuage grief</div><div style="margin:10px 0">sometimes to celebrate</div><div style="margin:10px 0">often late at night secret eating</div><div style="margin:10px 0">munching, ingesting</div><div style="margin:10px 0">taking in</div><div style="margin:10px 0">gorging on</div><div style="margin:10px 0">cake and ice cream</div><div style="margin:10px 0">chocolate</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and potato chips</div><div style="margin:10px 0">even beer</div><div style="margin:10px 0">or liqueur</div><div style="margin:10px 0">with exotic</div><div style="margin:10px 0">items like mangos</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and papayas</div><div style="margin:10px 0">all carefully laid out before her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">because she liked the ritual of it</div><div style="margin:10px 0">the handing</div><div style="margin:10px 0">the smells</div><div style="margin:10px 0">the preparations and the cooking; </div><div style="margin:10px 0">fork and spoon lifting high</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to the altar of her mouth</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to her wide lips</div><div style="margin:10px 0">resting briefly upon her fiery tongue</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to the savoring</div><div style="margin:10px 0">the plunging onward</div><div style="margin:10px 0">into the alimentary canal</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to its final</div><div style="margin:10px 0">warm resting place</div><div style="margin:10px 0">inside.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">And then the guilt</div><div style="margin:10px 0">always the guilt</div><div style="margin:10px 0">about what she had done</div><div style="margin:10px 0">then on to the next day obsession about her weight</div><div style="margin:10px 0">the battle of the bulge</div><div style="margin:10px 0">of the unwanted thickening sure to come</div><div style="margin:10px 0">of the terrifying knowledge</div><div style="margin:10px 0">her eating at night</div><div style="margin:10px 0">it would show up</div><div style="margin:10px 0">decorating her waist line</div><div style="margin:10px 0">her hips, </div><div style="margin:10px 0">her thighs</div><div style="margin:10px 0">crime and punishment come alive</div><div style="margin:10px 0">visible for all to see.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">She reveled in her pregnancy</div><div style="margin:10px 0">eating herself</div><div style="margin:10px 0">to 51 additional pounds</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and not losing all of them back</div><div style="margin:10px 0">despite furious exercise; </div><div style="margin:10px 0">ultimately welcoming mother hood</div><div style="margin:10px 0">because cooking for her kids kept her in touch</div><div style="margin:10px 0">with food</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and after all</div><div style="margin:10px 0">no mother</div><div style="margin:10px 0">was expected to be thin; </div><div style="margin:10px 0">and then escalator down</div><div style="margin:10px 0">she gradually gave up</div><div style="margin:10px 0">food had won</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and she knew</div><div style="margin:10px 0">that with advancing age</div><div style="margin:10px 0">she could not lose back the years.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">In despair, kids and husband now gone</div><div style="margin:10px 0">she decided that it was not the food she'd been carving</div><div style="margin:10px 0">all those years</div><div style="margin:10px 0">rather it was a feeling of being filled up</div><div style="margin:10px 0">being loved</div><div style="margin:10px 0">food was just a poor substitute</div><div style="margin:10px 0">And dear reader you ask what then? </div><div style="margin:10px 0">She fell in love with a younger man</div><div style="margin:10px 0">half her age</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and he reciprocated.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">the excitement of his loving her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">made her feel for the first time in years</div><div style="margin:10px 0">love</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and gradually over a year</div><div style="margin:10px 0">she lost the need for food<br>as a crutch.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">More and more it became</div><div style="margin:10px 0">for her a thing past.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">Oh she did not suddenly become a size two</div><div style="margin:10px 0">but she did become a better her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">more energy</div><div style="margin:10px 0">and she needed that energy</div><div style="margin:10px 0">becoming more and more thrilled</div><div style="margin:10px 0">with whom she then was.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">And yes, the two did last; </div><div style="margin:10px 0">food not so much exiled</div><div style="margin:10px 0">as becoming for her</div><div style="margin:10px 0">only a once over-indulged<br>repast<br>from her past.</div><div style="margin:10px 0"><br /></a><br />poem by <a href="http://en.citatepedia.ro/by.php?a=Lonnie+Hicks">Lonnie Hicks</a><div class=q>
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<script type="text/javascript" src="//s7.addthis.com/js/300/addthis_widget.js#pubid=citatepedia" async="async"></script><div style="display:inline-block" class="addthis_sharing_toolbox" data-url="http://en.citatepedia.ro/comments.php?id=448434" data-title="Food For Thought de Lonnie Hicks" data-description="She hid it

but it became clear to her

even as a child

she was obsessed with food-

all the world and her relationships in it-

became things to be tasted; 

consumed.

In her twenties she did not date men

she tasted them

and became bored

wit..."></div>
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