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<div style="background:#fff;border:#bbb dashed 1px;padding:5px"><a href="http://en.citatepedia.ro/comments.php?id=424602" style="color:#000;text-decoration:none"><div style="margin:10px 0"><strong>Advice to an Applicant - Parody Rudyard KIPLING – If</strong></div><div style="margin:10px 0">If you can back your boss and keep on smiling, <br>while toning down his brash absurdities, <br>if, having watched the man manhandle filing, <br>you rearrange the folders pretty please, <br>if coy and charming, beautiful, beguiling, <br>anticipating all contingencies, <br>you manage new accounts, contacts redialling, <br>correct crass spelling, cover vagaries...</div><div style="margin:10px 0">If you can keep your head while he’s resiling, <br>evolve successful counter-strategies, <br>if ‘mum’s the word’, discrete, effective tyling, <br>from busy-bodies safe when he agrees.<br>If you can spend your time in reconciling<br>his intellectual inanities, <br>never upset his fragile ego, heiling<br>whene’er he feels the need, or profits sneeze...</div><div style="margin:10px 0">If Windows easy comes, while modem dialing<br>to DSL migration’s not a tease, <br>if firewall free from viruses hostiling<br>you clean can keep, recalling password keys, <br>if the above you show him recompiling<br>the data lost when he lacks expertise, -<br>yet know your place as cypher, never riling, <br>remembering to bow before ‘big cheese’...</div><div style="margin:10px 0">If you can stand him publicly reviling<br>your good ideas, then claim them his with ease, <br>can watch while rival’s ruin he’s compiling<br>so coldly that a lizard’s blood would freeze.<br>If when betrayed by his ambitious wiling<br>you triumph through innate abilities, <br>ignoring basic scheming, baser guiling, <br>you seize the precious point he never sees! ...</div><div style="margin:10px 0">If you won’t blush when, rash, he’ll rush, exiling<br>your intuitions as freak fantasies, <br>but confidently while free-time he’s whiling, <br>circumvent his incapacities.<br>Surpassing him in brains, tact, versatiling, <br>you never strive to swap your salaries, <br>but both feet on the ground, still patient, smiling, <br>can counteract his incoherencies...</div><div style="margin:10px 0">If you are sure his image needs restyling, <br>select the suits that suit down to the tees, <br>if you are ever ready camomiling, <br>or sprinkling sugar, creaming, coffee, teas, <br>if you can trick his wayward infantiling<br>and censure not his immaturities, <br>ignore his clumsy tries at fond defling, <br>yet fondled, tactful, rise from off his knees...</div><div style="margin:10px 0">If you take three degrees while reconciling<br>your private life to further Ph.D.’s, <br>if you can children bear without work piling <br>and keep them free from trouble and disease, <br>if you can spring his quick promotion – vile thing –<br>and play the game of happy families...<br>Your’s is the job, the rest’s cosmetic styling, <br>the prized princess and pride of... secret’ries! </div><div style="margin:10px 0"></div><div style="margin:10px 0"> 21 Februrary 1990 & 23 May 2005</div><div style="margin:10px 0"><br /></a><br />poem by <a href="http://en.citatepedia.ro/by.php?a=Jonathan+Robin">Jonathan Robin</a><div class=q>
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<script type="text/javascript" src="//s7.addthis.com/js/300/addthis_widget.js#pubid=citatepedia" async="async"></script><div style="display:inline-block" class="addthis_sharing_toolbox" data-url="http://en.citatepedia.ro/comments.php?id=424602" data-title="Advice to an Applicant - Parody Rudyard KIPLING – If de Jonathan Robin" data-description="If you can back your boss and keep on smiling, 
while toning down his brash absurdities, 
if, having watched the man manhandle filing, 
you rearrange the folders pretty please, 
if coy and charming, beautiful, beguiling, 
anticipating all continge..."></div>
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